JUST ONE SYLLABLE

Banner has never been shy about expressing her opinions, for which I am grateful, usually.  But it occurred to me how efficiently she can convey a thought.  When Word starts counting syllables instead of whole words, I could be in trouble and Banner could be a star pupil, or the teacher.

This morning, I was up late. Round 3 of early winter respiratory illnesses, sleeping in 2-3 hour segments, then getting up with eyes closed. So a Newfoundland was very hungry. Yesterday she had banana pancakes, and there were leftovers in the frig for this morning. Eggs needed to be cooked. We are using brown eggs because the store was out of the jumbo size, which usually includes a number of double-yolk eggs. I tell her that she is very lucky when she gets a double-yolk egg. She didn’t feel very lucky this morning because breakfast was late.

While the eggs were cooking, I sliced some Tillamook cheddar to share with my observer. Once I finally began putting the eggs on a plate, I heard a “pfffsssh!” This is the long sigh issued by a Newf when humans require far too much patience. I asked her about the translation: does this mean, “Humans are so slow! They take forever.” (count the number of syllables that took) To which there was no response. She’s at least too polite to overstate her point.

And when her water dish needs a refill, which is frequent in the drier weather? A swipe of the tongue sends it sailing across a hard floor, resonating so it could be heard in the next town if not the next planet. (This is not an accident; she wants to be sure the message is clear.) That doesn’t even take one syllable.

How remarkable!

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LAYING OUT

It is that season again. No, not the one that I used to enjoy, the arrival of summer, soaking up the warmth of the sun, coated with oil, on a beach blanket (but on a grass lawn in the Ozarks). No, not for a Newf. It is THAT season: so cold and wonderful that all a good Newf wants to do is lay out and soak it in!

At least with a thick black coat, she won’t have to worry about the consequences of sun exposure.

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IF THE SHOE FITS . . .

Banner was waiting for her turn to go out with enthusiasm, even though she had been out 30 minutes earlier. The weather has been noticeably cooler, and any opportunity to go outside held promise. She was standing in the doorway of the bedroom, and I noticed that she was moving oddly on one rear leg, and she made a sound as she walked: clomp-thump, clomp-thump, clomp-thump.

My black Hoka slides were left beside the bed, on the other side of the room. We share a lot of things, and I have accused the Newfs over the years of trying to wear my shoes, but now, if I had any curiosity, I know her shoe size and style preference. Had the color been anything but black, it would have been obvious sooner. About then, Greg came in and she gave him a demonstration.

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LOOK WHO’S TALKING

Banner LOVES driving to the park and around town, or taking road trips. She watches out the windows with enthusiasm, like a kid going to a theme park, even when we take the same path or mostly the same path every day. As I stop at an intersection, I catch her watching through the windshield and wonder if she has figured out that green means go, or that red means Stop, most of the time. If that were the case, I think there would be more noise from the back seat passenger. And I think she would be barking for me to turn left or right, or perhaps it doesn’t matter as much to her as simply the going and the visual entertainment – what’s new here or there, is that black dog another Newf, who let the cat out, etc. On the other hand, if you pass the regular turn for where we park at the park, you will hear about it. And since there has been road construction on one side, we have had to take detours, to the sounds of a worried Newf. She thinks humans need a certain amount of supervision.

Today I left without her (GASP!) to meet Greg for breakfast. I saved a piece of bacon to take home, due penance in such a situation (being in an area of food without the Newf). As I stood outside waiting, there were two young men talking in front of me. One was encouraging the other to listen to a video about something. Being a good listener, I kept listening. The speaker caught onto that and continued his testimony. He said something about people in the 60s turning to Jesus because no one else wanted them. Then he had my full attention. Here was someone whose history lesson, no doubt through church or church school, informed him in a way that allowed him to view the social movement of that time with sympathy, but under a highly focused filter. Preachers are driven to use examples to support their preferred interpretations in order to get the message across that they want others to hear. I felt like calling him out and mentioning that World War I began as a religious war, but managed to get to the truck without interjecting. Sometimes an interjection is wise, sometimes it cements beliefs in the wrong way. But I wish people, of any age, would choose carefully who they listen to. Bias may not be fully avoidable, but it is an intellectual compromise that leads to social problems.

I’m always telling my Newfs that Listening is Very Important. Somehow they seem to need little coaching on who they listen to, except for that obnoxious drama-enthusiastic terrier mix. It’s easy to see how reinforcement occurs when she behaves badly and Banner excitedly goes in to reward her for her drama. (Amen!)

Disclaimer: not all religious leaders or followers are driven toward misconceptions, and those who are probably listened to somebody else.

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